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The GOOD, the BAD and the UGLY with Clint COUNCIL




It's been 44 years since "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly" was released which was the third and final film in the trilogy, following "A Fistful of Poor Playgrounds" and "For a Few Slides more". Melbourne Playgrounds wanted to celebrate the 44 year anniversary and is casting the remake of "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly".

We thought it would be a good idea to cast the Melbourne councils in some of the roles. We asked Max Markson for some help with the casting but he was still at a luxury resort spending all the money he earned during that Lara Bingle matter. So we sent an e-mail to all the Melbourne councils asking for a list of playgrounds, Skate Parks and BMX Tracks in their council area.

The casting director has carefully studied the responses (during the add breaks on MasterChef) and has formulated his thoughts.

Unfortunately the film is not called "The Fantastic, The Bad and the Ugly". Otherwise, the Mornington Peninsula council would be a certainty for the FANTASTIC role. Not only did they give us a list of playgrounds with Melways References but sent us a lovely brochure with a map of the playground locations.

Some candidates for the GOOD role are Banyule, Bayside, Boroondara, Cardinia, Darebin, Frankston, Glen Eira, Greater Dandenong, Hobson's Bay, Hume, Kingston, Knox, Manningham, Maribyrnong, Maroondah, Melton, Monash, Moonee Valley, Moreland, Nillumbik, Port Phillip, Stonnington, Whittlesea, Wyndham, Yarra and Yarra Ranges councils. These councils have all replied to us.

Some candidates currently being considered for the UGLY role:

Brimbank council who sent a list of their best playgrounds but has not included ALL of their playgrounds. Maybe they want the role of the half pregnant woman?

The Playground & Recreation Association Victoria (PRAV) who received the script and promptly tore it into a million pieces while running around in circles and screaming “We hate Melbourne Playgrounds”. They must have missed the last round of vaccinations and contracted "Headless Chicken" disease. Why would an organisation with a basic principle of "increasing play opportunities for children, young people and families" advise councils not to give us a list of playgrounds?

However, the Casey council is almost a certainty for the downright UGLY role. Their response to our request was "The Council will not supply you with a list of Playgrounds, Skate Parks and BMX Tracks within Casey as you requested. This information can be obtained by reading the latest Melways." Surely the quality of playgrounds in Casey can't be so bad that they have to hide them from our reviews?

Maybe we could offer them all $200,000 to respond to Melbourne Playgrounds. It seemed to work for Woman's Day.

Rest assured, we will work hard to finalize our cast over the next week. Then we need to find a suitable filming location - maybe in front of the Casey council Offices?




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